Fuck Akron

Last night I took a trip to Akron Ohio with 2 buddies (Puka and Ryan) to visit a third (Lee). Lee is a senior at the University of Akron this year. He invited us down for his first house party of the school year. It was all fun and games for a while, you know, drinking beers and telling stories and pretending I was still in college for a night. There was a major street/block party about 4 or 5 blocks away. Kind of like Lowesfest. We spent about an hour there because Lee really wanted to show us but we were back at his place about 9:45 or so. It's a decent sized party, about 40-50 people on the front yard and porch and about 10 minutes walking from campus. About 11:30 we start hearing talk about how the Akron po'lice broke up the block party thing with tear gas. Word on the street was that some drunk kids were throwing beers at passing cars and hit a cruiser. If that's true, they're painfully retarded and had it coming. About 10-15 minutes later, a cruiser speeds up to the house and slams on the brakes. 2 officers get out and one says "You have 3 seconds to vacate the premises...3..2..1" and on 1 they both threw canisters of tear gas into the crowd. Seconds later, a second cruiser stops and 2 more officers step out and throw 2 more canisters, followed by a fucking paddy wagon. At this point I turn and book through the neighborhood and head back towards the main campus area coughing most of the way. One choice moment during my escape was some drunk dude yelling "You can't spray that shit I'm allergic to it!"(duh, it's tear gas, you're not supposed to enjoy it). I make it back to the the campus and sit down in the shadows between 2 buildings near the main quad and start calling my friends to find out what happened to them. We all meet up on campus in about a half hour. Our eyes are red and watering and all coughing and/or sneezing, but fortunately none of us have been arrested (Ya'll about to go to jail!). Puka, Ryan, and I decide we're done with this bullshit and head back home. It was the coughiest, sneeziest car ride I have ever been a part of.

I'm trying to watch football now, but I can't really enjoy it. Thanks to Visine, my the color of my eyes has faded to a gentle pink, but they still water up frequently. My nose itches, my thoat is scratchy, and I can't stop coughing. Fuck you, Akron. I shan't be returning to see you anytime soon.